Take a walk on the wild side. Not your usual beef (now we have nothing against beef, and are very partial to a good juicy beef burger, but beef is a bit, erm vanilla). We now have a range of exotic wild meat burgers.
During the after Christmas part of the year, when our work load drops rapidly for a couple of months. We use the time for maintaining and refreshing our equipment. Improving what we do, and adding new lines to our services.
With the new found spirit of democracy permeating the business. We now hold group sessions to actually discuss things. Truth be told, I still prefer the old system of benevolent dictatorship, but I am co-operating at the minute.
In the interests of bringing you the tastiest burgers possible we undertook a series of ‘tastings’ to check out the potential contenders. Here is a round up of what the butcher told us, and what Emmerson and I thought of the meat.
Crocodile Burger
Now I admit, this one is unusual, I mean, usually its the crocodile doing the eating.
They Said; This one has the look and texture of chicken with a bit of a shellfish taste to it.
Jason Said; This one wasn’t bad, it was more chicken like than beef, but had a faint tang of prawns in the aftertaste. Not my favourite, but edible.
Emmerson Said; Not a big fan, too fishy tasting for me.
Ostrich Burger
Just in case you don’t know, an Ostrich is a bird. Now I know this conjures up images of a robin or something. That’s about as far away as you can get from this bird. Its big. Bloody big in fact, upto 9ft tall in some cases. It is also bloody heavy, weighing as much as 2 adult humans. Oh, and its also bloody fast. Reaching 40m.p.h in bursts and being able to maintain about 35 m.p.h over long distance runs. Makes you wonder how they catch the bloody things.
This one is quite healthy. Well, for meat. It is a red meat (ha, bet you were expecting white like a chicken, which is also a bird). It is lower in fat than beef and high in protein. During the mad cow disease days, or Bovine spongiform encephalopathy to give it its true title (for the record I can actually pronounce that). There were a number of initiatives to replace beef with ostrich, but it seemed to fizzle out after a couple of years.
They Said: A great healthy alternative, low in fat, high in protein and taste delicious
Jason Said; Weird being red meat, cos you really expect a bird to be white. Not bad, similar to beef.
Emmerson Said; I liked this one, not too strong a taste, but different.
Kangaroo Burger
Another iconic animal, hailing from the land down under. I know we all tend to think of them as cute and cuddly, but an Aussie friend tells me they are a real pest. Oh, and they are definitely not cuddly, being heavily muscled and potentially quite dangerous. Personally I voted against this one as it would feel too much like eating Skippy. (If you don’t know who Skippy is, ask your mum, or possibly grandma).
They Said: This one is a very tender, heavily flavoured meat.
Jason Said: I liked this a lot, a strong taste that stood out.
Emmerson Said:The bold earthy flavour definitely puts a bounce in your taste buds.
Wild Boar Burger
This one is another animal, that if you haven’t seen one tends to get associated with a pig. These can be huge. Like, massively huge. Weighing upto around 330kg (about 4 average sized humans). These can be aggressive, are heavily muscled and bloody heavy. There are plenty of documented cases of people being killed by boars.
They Said : A nutty, sweet flavour, but lower in fat than pork.
Jason Said: Another flavoursome meat that stood out.
Emmerson Said: Eatable, but not my favourite.
Now we also have another entry to the menu that has been democratically voted on. I wish to go on record as being dead against this one. But sadly, not everyone is as sensitive and deeply caring as me. This one is the;
Zebra Burger
I think it smacks of cannibalism. We choose an anthropomorphic zebra for our company logo, then decide to eat him.
They Said; “This one has a subtle taste compared to the others”
Emmerson Said : the taste is similar to a beef burger but different , slightly disappointed the burger didn’t have the stripes in.
Jason Said : OH MY GOD! I can’t believe we just ate Ziggy!!!!
Buffalo
Weighing anything upto almost a ton. This is one big chunk of meat. Gawd knows how many burgers is walking around in this image.
They Said; A very health and tasty alternative to beef. The burger is high in nutrients such as protein.
Emmerson Said; Definite liked this, stronger than beef but very similar.
Jason Said; Loved this one, very beef tasting, but a stronger flavour.
If fancy a walk on the wild side and would like to book our Exotic Burgers Service, then check out our burger services.
